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Becoming Disciples

All believers are called to be disciples, or followers, of Jesus. Join Lisa Hensley in exploring what that process looks like.
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Now displaying: 2016
Dec 21, 2016

This week we are tackling a question from Anna and discussing how to stay focused on God when you are single and would like a husband. Or in other words, how to cultivate a life where you are when you would like to be somewhere else. 

 

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Dec 14, 2016

All of us have unexpected events occur in life, but what are we going to do when they come? We can either throw a fit because we aren't getting our way or we can walk a path of grace- because God always goes before us. This week we are discussing some ideas for managing life when the unexpected arrives.

  1. Am I really willing to let God interrupt my plans?
  2. You can be sad and surrendered.
  3. Share your heart carefully. 
  4. Be flexible with routines and schedules.

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Dec 7, 2016

The podcast is back! Our sabbatical did exactly what we needed it to (more on that in a full episode next week) and we are excited to be back with you this month! Today we're tackling a listener question about how to handle awkward encounters, specifically with an ex.

 

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Oct 27, 2016

This week we're discussing how to manage the basics of home life and why it's important. Home management cares for your family while also making time for you to pursue other interests. 

Please note that we are taking a sabbatical for the month of November but we'll be back in December! 

The foundation of home management is self-discipline. Discipline brings freedom. 

Then we discuss the various ways that we have handled different aspects of home management and suggest some other options that might work for you. We discuss:

  1. Meal planning
  2. Laundry
  3. Cleaning
  4. Scheduling

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Oct 17, 2016

In this week's mini episode, we talk fast and furious for five minutes about how to adult. What are core skills you need to succeed once you get out on your own? 

 

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Oct 13, 2016

This week we are answering a listener question. No, it's not a mini episode because we're tackling how to move from singleness to marriage. We discuss five areas that will help you share your life with your man. 

  1. Clear communication: have open and continual conversations
  2. Self-Denial: life is not about you
  3. Understanding what marriage is: the goal is for your husband to serve God better
  4. Honesty about expectations: your husband can't read your mind
  5. Grace for growing: a difficult season in marriage doesn't mean it's over

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Oct 10, 2016

This week we tackle how you can improve communication in your dating relationship and share date ideas for getting to know the other person. 

 

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Oct 6, 2016

Phylicia just moved 12 hours and her family is living with her parents while they renovate the house they just bought. Lisa is in the process of transitioning some of some of her son's medical care and we've both been reminded that transitions and waiting for the final solution is often harder than it should be. This week, we're going to discuss how we can walk through transitions in a way that glorifies God.

  1. Don't rush it. You like to avoid difficulty because it's uncomfortable but it's helping you grow.
  2. It's ok to grieve. You can be sad about leaving people or places or seasons in life.
  3. God's will is clear today. You might not know what's coming tomorrow or next week but you do know what God wants you to do right now.

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Oct 3, 2016

Thank you for all the questions for this Q+A format! This week, Phylicia and I are tackling the topic of boudoir photography and whether it's appropriate or marriage-enhancing.

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Sep 29, 2016

We are excited to announce the start of a weekly Q+A mini episode where we will tackle one listener question in (hopefully) under ten minutes. 

For the inaugural episode we are discussing whether pursuing a dream conflicts with a wife's role of supporting her husband and if that matters before marriage.  

The Q+A episodes will typically air on Mondays with your regular content released on Thursdays. Thanks for listening! 

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Sep 22, 2016

We implemented a technique while recording this week that we discuss in this podcast on productivity and we recorded at naptime. We typically record at night when our children are sleeping but because we have a "plan B" for finishing our work, we could be flexible. In other words, you'll hear a few child noises in the background. 

The first step to outlining your schedule is lining up with the Bible and your family needs. It's not enough to cross items off a list. You want to cross the right items off your list. 

  1. Know what you need to do. 
    • Write it down.
    • Is it realistic? 
  2. Have a time for each task. 
    • If it doesn't have a time, it won't get done. 
    • Have a schedule for appointments and a rhythm for daily life. 
    • Find a "plan B."
  3. Have a pared-down schedule for when life gets crazy. 
    • bare bones cleaning, meals, school
  4. Learn to prioritize your tasks for each day, or part of the day. 
    • Implement a "big 3" or "big 5"

 

 

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Sep 15, 2016

We both prefer the word "queen" over "princess"; there's an implied maturity difference between the two. This week, we take on why the Christian "I'm God's Princess" mentality often leads to behavior as bratty as Jasmine's in Aladdin. Then we offer a few suggestions to move from a self-centered focus on life to a God-centered focus. 

  1. What is the princess mentality? A truth exaggerated for selfish purposes, often promoted in Christian circles as an alternative to secular feminism's women's empowerment. 
  2. What is the problem with the princess mentality? The princess mentality uses God to validate yourself. God didn't save you to feel good about yourself; He saved you for a purpose. 
  3. What's the solution for the princess mentality? (Kate Middleton, Duchess of Cambridge, is our example here.) Knowing our identity in Christ should motivate us to live a life set apart, not a life for ourselves. 

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Sep 8, 2016

We wanted to point out that preparing for marriage looks a lot like preparing for adulthood. Younger females, especially in Christian circles, tend to idolize marriage and it is not the end-all, be-all of life. Work toward being a well-rounded Christian woman and you'll be on your way to developing the skills to be a good wife.

  1. Develop your relationship with God. You are not looking for your soulmate or someone to complete you. Find your identity in Christ. Whoever you marry is going to let you down.
  2. Learn practical skills. Learn how to tackle new problems and projects. Be prepared to use your skills before marriage, in ministry, to support and assist your husband, or run a business.
  3. Invest in relationships. Learn how to develop friendships and people skills before you jump into a marriage and need to nurture a close relationship.
  4. Practice putting others first. Listen when others talk and develop relationships where your friends can confront you with the truth. The world won't revolve you even in your marriage.

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Sep 1, 2016

This week we are talking about why you should read your Bible. Devotionals can be helpful and have their place but nothing replaces opening God's Word for yourself. We are going to walk through Psalm 19:7-11 in this episode so get out your Bible if you want to follow along.

  1. The law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul. The Bible shows us the nature of God and the nature of sin. The first reason we go to the Bible is to find out who God is. Then we discover who we are, with and without Christ.
  2. The testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple. You find out how to live God's way by reading the Bible. We also include a slight tangent about finding God's will in this section.
  3. The statutes of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart. Ask God to give you insight into and a desire for the Word. Explore different study methods if you are getting stuck studying the Bible.
  4. The commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes. The Bible reveals the truth, the way to walk, and what sin is. It also transforms your life as you encounter God.
  5. The fear of the Lord is clean, enduring forever. God's Word is unchanging; it is a firm foundation for your life.
  6. The judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether. Psalm 119:128 Either all the Bible is true and you are going to accept it or you don't accept any of it.
  7. More to be desired are they than gold. As you cultivate your walk with God, your desire for the Bible will increase. Also, honesty in prayer is totally acceptable.
  8. Moreover by them is thy servant warned: and in keeping of them there is great reward. The Bible tells us what to avoid. God blesses obedience. 2 Timothy 3:16-17

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Aug 25, 2016

This week we are discussing how to thrive regardless of where you are in your life journey. You don't always get to pick where you are and yet it's important that you show up. 

  1. Engage with life.
    • Get involved with your community and in relationships and at a church. Don't just hole up in your dorm room or apartment with Netflix as your friend.
    • Develop as a single person or as a married without kids even if you are anticipating a change in that status.
    • Make the effort to get involved with other friends/personal interests if you're home with small children.
    • Social media is great but don't rely on that; develop relationships with real people.
  2. Pursue contentment.
    • Recognize God is sovereign.
    • Contentment is not a state of being; you're not going to arrive.
    • Honor God where you are.
  3. Make the choice to thrive.
    • Act how you want to feel.
    • Speak truth to yourself; don't listen to yourself.
    • You serve God because He loves you, not because you are expecting something from Him.
    • Put down roots to be ready for a transplant.
    • Embrace your place.

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Aug 18, 2016

Last week we discussed how college benefited our lives as mamas and that naturally transitions into how to work from home as a mama. We both do different types of work from our homes so that we can be home with our child(ren). These principles don't just apply to paid jobs; you can use the same methods to pursue a side hustle, volunteer, or serve in ministry.

  1. Pros and Cons of working from home
    • pros: more time with kids, flexible hours, pursue personal goals
    • cons: self-starting, requires sacrifices, often uncomfortable
  2. How to make working from home work for you
    • have a rhythm
    • prioritize and know your limits
    • be self-disciplined
    • do the work
  3. How to find work
    • transitioning an office job to a work-from-home position
    • volunteering
    • learn new skills
    • childcare
    • ministry

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Aug 11, 2016

We are both stay at home (or more accurately work at home) mamas. And yet we both have college degrees that we spent time and money pursuing and neither of us feel that was wasted. Why? That's what we're delving into this week. If all you want to be is a wife and mom, why should you consider college? 

  1. Should you go? Not everyone should go to college; there are many other options. There is no "holy" choice; you must decide what God wants you to do.
  2. How to succeed. All the skills you learn to succeed in college will help you succeed either as a wife and mom or in a job or career. College is an investment in yourself. 
  3. Why it matters. You don't know the future: when/if you'll get married, if you'll have kids, what will come after that. Having the skills and education necessary to support yourself or serve in ministries will only benefit your life and the lives of those around you. 

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Aug 4, 2016

This week we are tackling the topic of fear. We discuss why fear is a faith issue, doing things scared, how your personality type affects your reaction to fear, and how pride is connected to fear. And, of course, we wrap it up with some practical suggestions to help you live fearlessly.

To celebrate our 50th episode we are running a giveaway! Head over to iTunes before next Thursday and leave the podcast a rating and review to be entered to win.

  1. Fear is a faith issue.
    • grounded in lack of trust
    • decreases with spiritual maturity
    • is a normal problem
    • There is no grace for imagination
  2. The first step is scary. And sometimes the second one is too.
    • do it scared
    • do something every day that scares you
    • don't base decisions on fear
  3. Facing your fears
    • limit fear-causing input
    • take your thoughts captive
    • ask "what's the worst that can happen?"
    • memorize verses on fear

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Jul 28, 2016

We have been thrilled with the feedback from the sex series! This week we are wrapping it up with some listener Q+A. You all sent us some great questions about sex and sex-related issues. If you have enjoyed this series, leave us a rating and review in iTunes and share the podcast with a friend!

  1. How do you overcome your fear of the gynecologist?
  2. What is the spiritual component of sex?
  3. What are appropriate places to have sex?
  4. When should you talk about sex to your boyfriend or fiance?
  5. How can you prepare for your wedding night as a virgin?
  6. What are Christians resources for spicing up your sex life?

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Jul 21, 2016

We went all out for this episode. We received a bunch of questions about birth control so we went for it. No answers but lots of options and honest discussion about how we chose what we do.  Neither of us have a problem with preventing pregnancy so if you do and you're fine with your decision, just skip this episode. 

Also: probably shouldn't listen with your kids! 

1. Attitude: To start a discussion about birth control is to start a discussion about who's plans matter more, ours or God's? We always want to align our hearts with God's values and priorities. 

2. Types of birth control: We list multiple options of birth control. 

3. Personal Testimonies, er, stories? Anyways, we chat about what we've each done for birth control. 

Resources: Woman Code by Alisa Vitti

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Jul 14, 2016

As we continue the sex series, we wanted to discuss how to establish boundaries in dating and why it's important to do so. There are so many questions about what's ok and what's not ok and how you actually live out your standards. In this episode we go over five thoughts on pursuing purity.

  1. Know the "why" of purity. The motivation for your behavior should always be to honor God. Of course obedience also brings blessings and benefits for you.
  2. Be accountable.  You should have someone who will check up on how you are doing. You should also be able to take your struggles and questions to them.
  3. Purity is about the heart, not a list of rules. While there are basic clear-cut guidelines most of this journey will involve growing closer to God and listening to Him speak. You can't make your personal standards a line to judge others.
  4. Virginity doesn't equal purity. You can still be pure after you've lost your virginity and you are still pure once you're married and no longer a virgin.
  5. Ask "how holy can I be?" instead of "how far can I go?".  The question should always be "will this activity help me honor God?" This will also depends on the limits of the person you are dating.

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Jun 30, 2016

This week we are covering the last two of our five myths about sex. (Go back and listen to last week's episode if you haven't!) Then we move into a discussion about sex in marriage.

Myths 4 and 5

Myth 4: Babies ruin your sex life.

  • Entering parenthood can increase intimacy which improves sex.
  • Sex can become a way to connect amidst the demands of parenting

Myth 5: Married sex is boring.

  • Marriage is God's context for sex.
  • As you grow closer in marriage, you can grow closer sexually.

Marriage and Sex

  1. Honeymoon sex is not the best sex.
    • The honeymoon is not the culmination of your romance; it's the beginning.
  2. How you view your body affects your sex life.
    • Having a low body-esteem will affect your sex life negatively.
  3. Emotional intimacy can be a product of sexual intimacy.
    • Your sex life is a journey.
  4. Marriage is the place for a guilt-free sexual fulfillment.

Guidelines for what's "not okay" even in marriage.

  • Anything that involves another person.
  • Anything that demeans or hurts either the husband or the wife.
  • Anything that causes a physical or emotional issue with either person.
  • Anything against the will of the husband or wife.

You can't believe what Hollywood and secular sources have to say about something that God designed when they aren't using it the way that He intended.

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Jun 23, 2016

This week we are starting our discussion about sex because, for the most part, the world talks about sex and no one else does. There should be a Christian message about sex because God designed it.

God's design for sex:

  • spiritual, emotional, physical intimacy
  • context of marriage
  • discussed in appropriate, respectful ways
  1. Myth 1: Sex is dirty. 
    • stems from a desire to discourage immorality
    • typically a female issue
    • God made sex and He is holy. Sex in God's context is also holy. 
    • perspective on sex must change even if you are single
  2. Myth 2: Sex is for men. 
    • God designed sex for women too. 
    • Sex is not a duty. 
    • Read Song of Solomon
  3. Myth 3: Women don't enjoy or want sex. 
    • Women have more complicated sex drives than men. 
    • God designed women to enjoy sex.
    • Sex is not a duty. (Did we say that already?)

We're coming back next week with two more myths but the major thought is that how you think about sex matters. If your sexuality is a burden as a single person, sex becomes a burden after marriage. If your sexuality is something to flaunt then it ceases to be precious and private. 

Resources: 

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Jun 16, 2016

We're both big believers in what's now known as the "side hustle." Phy's was a source of fulfillment while she worked an unfulfilling job and Lisa has blogged since her oldest son was almost one. But side hustles can be a lot of different things and sometimes you can convince yourself you don't have time for one. (Hint: you probably do.)

  1. What is a side hustle? 
    • product of passion and producer of purpose
  2. Prioritizing a side hustle
    • comes after our relationship with God, marriage, and children
    • evaluate schedule and find a time
  3. Practical tips for a side hustle
    • don't do anything while kids are sleeping that you can do while they are awake
    • have a plan for your work time
    • don't waste time
    • use your freedom- change your side hustle when you need to
    • get outside your box- don't be afraid to start something new

Grow as a person and you'll be a better wife, mom, sister, daughter, and employee.

 

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Jun 9, 2016

This week we are talking about ten of our favorite things! Our typical topics are serious and somewhat heavy so we like to throw in some fun conversations occasionally so you can get to know us and we can get your feedback on the questions and know you better too. So ten of our favorites in random categories. 

Favorite Podcast

Favorite Book (of the moment)

Favorite Date Experience

  • P- Five Guys and pedicure (recent)
  • L- UT basketball game (future)

Favorite TV Show: 

  • P- NCIS
  • L- Psych
  • Shoutouts to Lie to Me, The Mentalist, Person of Interest

Favorite Songs:

Favorite Food

  • P- New Mexican
  • L- Mexican

Favorite Clothing Item

  • P- black zumba pants
  • L- high heels

Favorite Drink

  • P- Trim Healthy Mama iced coffee
  • L- Iced Coffee, Caramel Frappucino

Favorite Theological Resources

Favorite Morning Activity

  • P- Reading 
  • L- Writing

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