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Becoming Disciples

All believers are called to be disciples, or followers, of Jesus. Join Lisa Hensley in exploring what that process looks like.
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Now displaying: Page 5
Sep 22, 2016

We implemented a technique while recording this week that we discuss in this podcast on productivity and we recorded at naptime. We typically record at night when our children are sleeping but because we have a "plan B" for finishing our work, we could be flexible. In other words, you'll hear a few child noises in the background. 

The first step to outlining your schedule is lining up with the Bible and your family needs. It's not enough to cross items off a list. You want to cross the right items off your list. 

  1. Know what you need to do. 
    • Write it down.
    • Is it realistic? 
  2. Have a time for each task. 
    • If it doesn't have a time, it won't get done. 
    • Have a schedule for appointments and a rhythm for daily life. 
    • Find a "plan B."
  3. Have a pared-down schedule for when life gets crazy. 
    • bare bones cleaning, meals, school
  4. Learn to prioritize your tasks for each day, or part of the day. 
    • Implement a "big 3" or "big 5"

 

 

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Sep 15, 2016

We both prefer the word "queen" over "princess"; there's an implied maturity difference between the two. This week, we take on why the Christian "I'm God's Princess" mentality often leads to behavior as bratty as Jasmine's in Aladdin. Then we offer a few suggestions to move from a self-centered focus on life to a God-centered focus. 

  1. What is the princess mentality? A truth exaggerated for selfish purposes, often promoted in Christian circles as an alternative to secular feminism's women's empowerment. 
  2. What is the problem with the princess mentality? The princess mentality uses God to validate yourself. God didn't save you to feel good about yourself; He saved you for a purpose. 
  3. What's the solution for the princess mentality? (Kate Middleton, Duchess of Cambridge, is our example here.) Knowing our identity in Christ should motivate us to live a life set apart, not a life for ourselves. 

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Sep 8, 2016

We wanted to point out that preparing for marriage looks a lot like preparing for adulthood. Younger females, especially in Christian circles, tend to idolize marriage and it is not the end-all, be-all of life. Work toward being a well-rounded Christian woman and you'll be on your way to developing the skills to be a good wife.

  1. Develop your relationship with God. You are not looking for your soulmate or someone to complete you. Find your identity in Christ. Whoever you marry is going to let you down.
  2. Learn practical skills. Learn how to tackle new problems and projects. Be prepared to use your skills before marriage, in ministry, to support and assist your husband, or run a business.
  3. Invest in relationships. Learn how to develop friendships and people skills before you jump into a marriage and need to nurture a close relationship.
  4. Practice putting others first. Listen when others talk and develop relationships where your friends can confront you with the truth. The world won't revolve you even in your marriage.

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Sep 1, 2016

This week we are talking about why you should read your Bible. Devotionals can be helpful and have their place but nothing replaces opening God's Word for yourself. We are going to walk through Psalm 19:7-11 in this episode so get out your Bible if you want to follow along.

  1. The law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul. The Bible shows us the nature of God and the nature of sin. The first reason we go to the Bible is to find out who God is. Then we discover who we are, with and without Christ.
  2. The testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple. You find out how to live God's way by reading the Bible. We also include a slight tangent about finding God's will in this section.
  3. The statutes of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart. Ask God to give you insight into and a desire for the Word. Explore different study methods if you are getting stuck studying the Bible.
  4. The commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes. The Bible reveals the truth, the way to walk, and what sin is. It also transforms your life as you encounter God.
  5. The fear of the Lord is clean, enduring forever. God's Word is unchanging; it is a firm foundation for your life.
  6. The judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether. Psalm 119:128 Either all the Bible is true and you are going to accept it or you don't accept any of it.
  7. More to be desired are they than gold. As you cultivate your walk with God, your desire for the Bible will increase. Also, honesty in prayer is totally acceptable.
  8. Moreover by them is thy servant warned: and in keeping of them there is great reward. The Bible tells us what to avoid. God blesses obedience. 2 Timothy 3:16-17

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Aug 25, 2016

This week we are discussing how to thrive regardless of where you are in your life journey. You don't always get to pick where you are and yet it's important that you show up. 

  1. Engage with life.
    • Get involved with your community and in relationships and at a church. Don't just hole up in your dorm room or apartment with Netflix as your friend.
    • Develop as a single person or as a married without kids even if you are anticipating a change in that status.
    • Make the effort to get involved with other friends/personal interests if you're home with small children.
    • Social media is great but don't rely on that; develop relationships with real people.
  2. Pursue contentment.
    • Recognize God is sovereign.
    • Contentment is not a state of being; you're not going to arrive.
    • Honor God where you are.
  3. Make the choice to thrive.
    • Act how you want to feel.
    • Speak truth to yourself; don't listen to yourself.
    • You serve God because He loves you, not because you are expecting something from Him.
    • Put down roots to be ready for a transplant.
    • Embrace your place.

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Aug 18, 2016

Last week we discussed how college benefited our lives as mamas and that naturally transitions into how to work from home as a mama. We both do different types of work from our homes so that we can be home with our child(ren). These principles don't just apply to paid jobs; you can use the same methods to pursue a side hustle, volunteer, or serve in ministry.

  1. Pros and Cons of working from home
    • pros: more time with kids, flexible hours, pursue personal goals
    • cons: self-starting, requires sacrifices, often uncomfortable
  2. How to make working from home work for you
    • have a rhythm
    • prioritize and know your limits
    • be self-disciplined
    • do the work
  3. How to find work
    • transitioning an office job to a work-from-home position
    • volunteering
    • learn new skills
    • childcare
    • ministry

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Aug 11, 2016

We are both stay at home (or more accurately work at home) mamas. And yet we both have college degrees that we spent time and money pursuing and neither of us feel that was wasted. Why? That's what we're delving into this week. If all you want to be is a wife and mom, why should you consider college? 

  1. Should you go? Not everyone should go to college; there are many other options. There is no "holy" choice; you must decide what God wants you to do.
  2. How to succeed. All the skills you learn to succeed in college will help you succeed either as a wife and mom or in a job or career. College is an investment in yourself. 
  3. Why it matters. You don't know the future: when/if you'll get married, if you'll have kids, what will come after that. Having the skills and education necessary to support yourself or serve in ministries will only benefit your life and the lives of those around you. 

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Aug 4, 2016

This week we are tackling the topic of fear. We discuss why fear is a faith issue, doing things scared, how your personality type affects your reaction to fear, and how pride is connected to fear. And, of course, we wrap it up with some practical suggestions to help you live fearlessly.

To celebrate our 50th episode we are running a giveaway! Head over to iTunes before next Thursday and leave the podcast a rating and review to be entered to win.

  1. Fear is a faith issue.
    • grounded in lack of trust
    • decreases with spiritual maturity
    • is a normal problem
    • There is no grace for imagination
  2. The first step is scary. And sometimes the second one is too.
    • do it scared
    • do something every day that scares you
    • don't base decisions on fear
  3. Facing your fears
    • limit fear-causing input
    • take your thoughts captive
    • ask "what's the worst that can happen?"
    • memorize verses on fear

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Jul 28, 2016

We have been thrilled with the feedback from the sex series! This week we are wrapping it up with some listener Q+A. You all sent us some great questions about sex and sex-related issues. If you have enjoyed this series, leave us a rating and review in iTunes and share the podcast with a friend!

  1. How do you overcome your fear of the gynecologist?
  2. What is the spiritual component of sex?
  3. What are appropriate places to have sex?
  4. When should you talk about sex to your boyfriend or fiance?
  5. How can you prepare for your wedding night as a virgin?
  6. What are Christians resources for spicing up your sex life?

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Jul 21, 2016

We went all out for this episode. We received a bunch of questions about birth control so we went for it. No answers but lots of options and honest discussion about how we chose what we do.  Neither of us have a problem with preventing pregnancy so if you do and you're fine with your decision, just skip this episode. 

Also: probably shouldn't listen with your kids! 

1. Attitude: To start a discussion about birth control is to start a discussion about who's plans matter more, ours or God's? We always want to align our hearts with God's values and priorities. 

2. Types of birth control: We list multiple options of birth control. 

3. Personal Testimonies, er, stories? Anyways, we chat about what we've each done for birth control. 

Resources: Woman Code by Alisa Vitti

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Jul 14, 2016

As we continue the sex series, we wanted to discuss how to establish boundaries in dating and why it's important to do so. There are so many questions about what's ok and what's not ok and how you actually live out your standards. In this episode we go over five thoughts on pursuing purity.

  1. Know the "why" of purity. The motivation for your behavior should always be to honor God. Of course obedience also brings blessings and benefits for you.
  2. Be accountable.  You should have someone who will check up on how you are doing. You should also be able to take your struggles and questions to them.
  3. Purity is about the heart, not a list of rules. While there are basic clear-cut guidelines most of this journey will involve growing closer to God and listening to Him speak. You can't make your personal standards a line to judge others.
  4. Virginity doesn't equal purity. You can still be pure after you've lost your virginity and you are still pure once you're married and no longer a virgin.
  5. Ask "how holy can I be?" instead of "how far can I go?".  The question should always be "will this activity help me honor God?" This will also depends on the limits of the person you are dating.

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Jun 30, 2016

This week we are covering the last two of our five myths about sex. (Go back and listen to last week's episode if you haven't!) Then we move into a discussion about sex in marriage.

Myths 4 and 5

Myth 4: Babies ruin your sex life.

  • Entering parenthood can increase intimacy which improves sex.
  • Sex can become a way to connect amidst the demands of parenting

Myth 5: Married sex is boring.

  • Marriage is God's context for sex.
  • As you grow closer in marriage, you can grow closer sexually.

Marriage and Sex

  1. Honeymoon sex is not the best sex.
    • The honeymoon is not the culmination of your romance; it's the beginning.
  2. How you view your body affects your sex life.
    • Having a low body-esteem will affect your sex life negatively.
  3. Emotional intimacy can be a product of sexual intimacy.
    • Your sex life is a journey.
  4. Marriage is the place for a guilt-free sexual fulfillment.

Guidelines for what's "not okay" even in marriage.

  • Anything that involves another person.
  • Anything that demeans or hurts either the husband or the wife.
  • Anything that causes a physical or emotional issue with either person.
  • Anything against the will of the husband or wife.

You can't believe what Hollywood and secular sources have to say about something that God designed when they aren't using it the way that He intended.

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Jun 23, 2016

This week we are starting our discussion about sex because, for the most part, the world talks about sex and no one else does. There should be a Christian message about sex because God designed it.

God's design for sex:

  • spiritual, emotional, physical intimacy
  • context of marriage
  • discussed in appropriate, respectful ways
  1. Myth 1: Sex is dirty. 
    • stems from a desire to discourage immorality
    • typically a female issue
    • God made sex and He is holy. Sex in God's context is also holy. 
    • perspective on sex must change even if you are single
  2. Myth 2: Sex is for men. 
    • God designed sex for women too. 
    • Sex is not a duty. 
    • Read Song of Solomon
  3. Myth 3: Women don't enjoy or want sex. 
    • Women have more complicated sex drives than men. 
    • God designed women to enjoy sex.
    • Sex is not a duty. (Did we say that already?)

We're coming back next week with two more myths but the major thought is that how you think about sex matters. If your sexuality is a burden as a single person, sex becomes a burden after marriage. If your sexuality is something to flaunt then it ceases to be precious and private. 

Resources: 

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 Phylicia Delta Blog

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Jun 16, 2016

We're both big believers in what's now known as the "side hustle." Phy's was a source of fulfillment while she worked an unfulfilling job and Lisa has blogged since her oldest son was almost one. But side hustles can be a lot of different things and sometimes you can convince yourself you don't have time for one. (Hint: you probably do.)

  1. What is a side hustle? 
    • product of passion and producer of purpose
  2. Prioritizing a side hustle
    • comes after our relationship with God, marriage, and children
    • evaluate schedule and find a time
  3. Practical tips for a side hustle
    • don't do anything while kids are sleeping that you can do while they are awake
    • have a plan for your work time
    • don't waste time
    • use your freedom- change your side hustle when you need to
    • get outside your box- don't be afraid to start something new

Grow as a person and you'll be a better wife, mom, sister, daughter, and employee.

 

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Jun 9, 2016

This week we are talking about ten of our favorite things! Our typical topics are serious and somewhat heavy so we like to throw in some fun conversations occasionally so you can get to know us and we can get your feedback on the questions and know you better too. So ten of our favorites in random categories. 

Favorite Podcast

Favorite Book (of the moment)

Favorite Date Experience

  • P- Five Guys and pedicure (recent)
  • L- UT basketball game (future)

Favorite TV Show: 

  • P- NCIS
  • L- Psych
  • Shoutouts to Lie to Me, The Mentalist, Person of Interest

Favorite Songs:

Favorite Food

  • P- New Mexican
  • L- Mexican

Favorite Clothing Item

  • P- black zumba pants
  • L- high heels

Favorite Drink

  • P- Trim Healthy Mama iced coffee
  • L- Iced Coffee, Caramel Frappucino

Favorite Theological Resources

Favorite Morning Activity

  • P- Reading 
  • L- Writing

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Jun 2, 2016

This week we're talking about myths of motherhood. Not all of them-  we narrowed it down to four to discuss in this episode. Motherhood gets an unbalanced portrayal in our culture and we try to add some balance from our experience and what we've learned from other women.

  1. You'll never sleep again. Or shower. Why do all pregnant women hear this? You will sleep, maybe not as much but you will sleep. And you can certainly squeeze in a shower.
  2. Your body will be ruined. Your body is a tool that allows you to serve God; it's not a showplace. Also your body is going to change even if you don't have kids.
  3. You'll lose your identity. Child-centric homes and families benefit no one. There is room for you to still be a person in motherhood; it will actually make you a better mom.
  4. You can control the outcome. We birth little sinners. We do our part to model and teach but eventually our children will make their own decisions. Just like we grew up and started making our own.

Motherhood might be harder than you think but it can also be better than you might think.

Resources:

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Delighting in My Days

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Phylicia Delta Blog

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May 26, 2016

This week we are talking about the ways we speak truth over ourselves instead of just believing the first thing we think. We're going to use the word "affirmations" but don't get all worked up, we're only talking about our own special phrases that we use to keep ourselves in line.

  1. Why it matters:  You live out the story you tell yourself in your mind.
    • Psalm 15:2
    • Philippians 4:8
    • Proverbs 18:21
  2. Our "affirmations"
    • Act how you want to feel
    • This is my dream job and I love you
    • Take the fun with you
    • I feel energetic and excited about today
    • "If I were a doctor" scenario
    • I am a Proverbs 31 woman and homeschool mama
  3. How to create your own
    • line up with Scripture
    • start with your struggles and identify the truth
    • avoid secular ideologies

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Apr 28, 2016

Whether it's a sin issue or a practical matter, failure is inevitable. It's what you do with it that matters. Failure affects everyone and we are discussing how to handle failure in this week's episode. 

  1. The crossroads of failure. What is success? It's possible you've been measuring success and failure incorrectly instead of lining it up with the Bible.  If you let failure harden you, it will lead to apathy and then despair. 
  2. Accepting responsibility for failure. You cannot move on until you stop blaming other people. 
  3. Remembering the truth. What does God say? We cannot wallow in our feelings but must believe what God says to be true. 
  4. Practical steps
    1. Faith: take God at His Word
    2. Obey: get up and try again
    3. Persevere: you're not picking the easy road
    4. Seek God: we can do none of this on our own

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Apr 21, 2016

Every woman struggles with insecurity in some area of her life. In this week's episode we discuss areas where we feel insecure and how we tackle gaining confidence in a world of body culture and Pinterest perfection. Confidence is something you can have- and not because you are the best at anything. 

In this episode we break down: 

  1. What confidence is.  Confidence is inner assurance fueled by faith. It is derived from a life of obedience and must be attained from outside ourselves. Proverbs 3:26
  2. What confidence is not.  Confidence is not being intelligent, good-looking, fit, or well-paid. Confidence that is based in ourselves is fleeting and rocky. 
  3. The alternative to confidence is insecurity. Two key takeaway phrases to base your behavior toward others on: "Be a 'there you are' person not a 'here I am' person. Also, "Be interested, not interesting." 
    • Insecurity robs us of opportunities to serve God
    • Insecurity robs us of relationships
    • Insecurity robs us of peace of mind
  4. Practical Suggestions: 
    • Pinpoint specific areas that cause insecurity. When do you feel insecure? What have you been listening to? Replace that with the truth of God's Word and assess your life by those standards instead of the voices you are paying attention to now. 
    • Act how you want to feel. If you were confident, how would you act? Change your posture; look people in the eye. Use a firm voice and look nice. Dress the part. 

Resource: Loving God with All Your Mind by Elizabeth George

 

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Apr 14, 2016

Emotional self control is a little discussed facet of being a strong woman. Being able to boss yourself around instead of being led by how you feel will make you a more joyful woman and allow you to better serve those around you. But how do you start this? It's a process and we're going to break it down for you.

First three facts about emotions:

  1. Emotions aren't trustworthy.
  2. You're not going to master this.
  3. Emotions aren't your boss.

Then three practical steps for being in charge of your emotions:

  1. Acknowledge feelings to God.
  2. Ask God to reveal the truth. Feelings lie.
  3. Pause- think and then act instead of reacting.

Bible References:

Jeremiah 17:9
Proverbs 16:32
Proverbs 25:28
Ephesians 3:16
Psalm 138:3

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Apr 6, 2016

Listener Sierra asked us how we choose contentment in daily life. We decided to record an entire episode because every woman struggles with contentment at some point. 

We discuss what contentment is and why you don't arrive at contentment. Instead it's a battle you'll fight every day. Then we give five practical steps to help you choose contentment.

 
Mar 30, 2016

This week Phylicia and I are talking about breaking the victim mindset: that belief that your happiness depends on other people. We talk about how to know if you have a victim mindset- and most of us do about something- and discuss three ways to correct your victim mindset.

  1. Be honest with yourself
  2. Accept responsibility
  3. Ask God for help

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Delighting in My Days

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Phylicia Delta Blog

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Mar 23, 2016

This week we're talking about how we push our men away and what we can do to fix it! We discuss three ways we often unintentionally drive our men away from us and offer suggestions of ways to bring them back. 

 

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Delighting in My Days

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Phylicia Delta Blog

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Mar 16, 2016

This week we're discussing how to deal with interruptions. Whether it's colleagues at the office, emails during your work time, or children when you're cooking lunch, we are constantly interrupted. And these interruptions are the perfect time to extend the grace of God to the people that surround- and bother- us.

In this episode we discuss three different types of interruptions and a few ideas for handling them with grace.

  1. Interruptions of a task
  2. Interruptions of the day
  3. Interruptions of your life plan

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Mar 9, 2016

This week we're talking about filling up when you're running on empty. How can you fill back up in order to give to others? We discuss filling up spiritually, emotionally, and relationally and how to add small things to your routine to cheer yourself up. 

 

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Delighting in My Days

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Phylicia Delta Blog

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